I am trying embark on a journey of self discovery and letting some inner troubles go. I have read parts of this book before(The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron). It causes you to look at yourself and free yourself from whatever is keeping you from accomplishing what you want out of life. I am also reading another book A Million Little Ways by Emily Freeman. This one explores how our creativity is derived from God and how he wants us to be creative individuals. It is interesting to see how both these books start with looking inwardly and seeking what is really there within us.
It seems I have always wanted to create something whatever that may be. I watched my sister Charlotte crochet afghans growing up and my mother doing some things when I was small. My dad was also creative. He made macramé chairs out of old lawn chair frames. I know when I was small I really wanted to paint a picture. It was very hard for me because of I couldn't draw a straight line. I can remember people always telling me that a picture I made was okay for a child. So somewhere along the lines I heard you are not a painter. You can't do anything like that. It have never really been voiced but that is what I felt I was being told. As youngster, I was often sick and when I was really little I had seizures a lot. I have very little memories of being really little. I think my memories start at around age 4 or so. My kids remember things from when they are 2 or 3 so that is amazing to me that I could have had memories from that age but they are lost to ether because of my health. I was not a very coordinated child either so everything I did was physically was very hard for me to do because it took twice as long for me do something than it took anyone else. So I was always the kid that was picked last for any game at school. I was always struggling to keep up. So I became the book kid. I was always reading something. It really helps now that I am an adult. I am really good at trivia games. (Now I am finally picked first for teams where trivia is involved.) But there was always this need to create something. My first craft was embroidery. I remember going to Thompson's store not for the candy so much as the stamped embroidery and floss they sold. I taught myself embroidery one summer. My mom helped as she could because she really couldn't see what I was doing but was able to describe the steps. So many summers when I didn't have a book I was stitching something too. Junior high and High school were just busy with homework and band and life. I think I started some counted cross stitch during this time on and off. That for me was like painting pictures. I figured it was the closest thing to being a Painter as I was going to get. But now I have taught myself numerous crafts. I finally started taking online classes about painting pictures and portraits. It has been so freeing to paint on an actual canvas and feel like that is a good painting. I have working on one canvas for a few weeks now. I have to finish it soon just because it gives me a great feeling of accomplishment. The bonus is I really like how is it taking shape. Maybe I will share when it is done. It is my faith combined with art that I think I like the most.
Well, I hope I can make myself take the commitment to go on this journey to find some truths that I have searching for a long time. I am not sure what I will find but I think it will worth it.
No comments:
Post a Comment